Just the other day, a friend and I were catching up, talking about life and how we were ... and we realized that it had been almost 10 years since we last had spoken.
Just. Like. That. 10 years. Poof! Gone.
Maybe you've had a similar realization, where you were going to take this job for a few years and hone your skills and then you were going to go after the big, bold dream that made your heart come alive. A vision that would allow you to really explore the depths of your potential, and your impact on this world.
But then 10 years passed by. And you're still at that same job. Your life is okay, I mean, you have nothing to complain about, and honestly, do you really have time to get that project started? I mean, that shit is HARD!
But, that inner wanting for something bigger, for you to realize your full potential, for you to become a version of you that you are so excited and proud to be, not for anyone else but for yourself, is still there. Still burning. Dim, maybe almost gone, but still there.
My job as your coach is to challenge you. To be a little in your face and say: "Are you really telling me that you're going to let another 10 years go by, and then another 10, and then before you know it you're 70, or 80, or whatever age you'll use as an excuse to say 'well, now I'm too old.'" And then, just like that, it will all be over and all you potential, your dreams, your passion, will have been wasted.
Hell. Freaking. No.
Start now. Get working on that project, go back to the powerful version of yourself that took 100% responsibility for your life and your brightness and bigness, stop making excuses as to why you can't have a life that feels exciting. You don't get to shrink before your life. Yes, I'm asking you, challenging you, pushing you to be bold and courageous.
Okay, okay, Luz! I get it - and you're right, damn it, the time is now! But wait ... what do I do?
Glad you asked! You can do this work on your own, or you can schedule a call with me. Either way, you can follow the next 5 steps and be well on your way to living your life with purpose and intentionality. Where you step into the driver's seat and BUILD, DESIGN, CREATE a life OF YOUR CHOOSING.
1. Your Funeral
Oh shit!! We went dark real fast.
Yep, we did. As a coach, I'm supportive but I'm also real and I'm going to ask the hard questions. I have to. I know I sound like a broken record, but THIS IS YOUR LIFE WE'RE TALKING ABOUT. It's kind of a big deal, don't ya think?
So yes, we're starting with your funeral. I want you to imagine your funeral. You are there and can see and hear everyone, but no one can see or hear you (I know what you're thinking: it's Harry Potter's invisibility cloak!! Nope...just a thought exercise, although that would be sweet!). I want you to think of what you would want people to say about who you were, how you showed up to life, the values you exemplified, how you treated those with less resources than you, the risks you took, the ways you were bold and courageous, how did you stand up for you and your dreams?
I want you to start there. At your funeral. So you can start thinking ahead, so you don't have to waste years, decades, a lifetime. Decide NOW who you want to be when it's all over. Decide how you will show up, even when it's hard. How you'll treat strangers, your team, your family, your spouse. How will you leave the world better off than you found it?
2. Mentor Patterns
Next, I want you to next find 10 people whose lives you would be super thrilled to step into for the next 10 years of your life. Think of what about their career and lifestyle specifically calls out to you. Is it that they get to travel, their adventures, the commitment to impact, their business acumen, the love they share with their spouse, that your role model is a female CEO and yet she manages to lead her company not as a man...but as a woman?
I want you to make a list of all the patterns you see in terms of career, lifestyle, and then I want you to take it one step further and find all the skills that they needed to grow into to be who they now are.
3. Pick Your 10-year Primary Field of Interest (PFI)
This idea comes from one of my mentors, Brendon Burchard. It's basically the concept that ...sorry to break it to you, but you can't do ALL the things. You gotta focus! Even Elon Musk chose the areas he committed to being excellent and the best in the world at. You have to choose.
So, what are mine? Peak Performance/Living Your BEST Life (Hi, I'm your peak performance coach ), Financial Empowerment, and Corporate Social Impact. This means I don't do anything that isn't aligned with these three.
When I'm invited to serve on boards, or get recruited to join companies, get an invite for a knitting party... it's an easy no.
I know who I am, I know who I'm becoming, and I've got my priorities straight.
So tell me, what are your three PFIs?
4. 1 Year Planning
Okay, so we've done the big picture work, we know the kind of life we want to live, we've strategically studied those who have been successful at living that kind of life and creating those results and life outcomes, next we're going to start implementing.
I want you to choose 3 skills that you are going to focus on for the next year. (Btw, if you didn't catch my training on how to plan for an epic 2019 check it out on my blog!) These are going to be three new stretch skills that will require you to take courses, attend seminars, hire a coach, and read books.
By the end of the year, you should feel basically like a new person. You have been intentional about being in the driver's seat of your own development, and growing yourself to someone that is now able to master aspects of a version-of-you you want to grow into.
Last but not least, we have boundaries! Ta-da! Now, for this to work, you've got to do the work. You can't get to this part of the process if you don't first do the stuff above!
What I discuss over and over with my clients is that you've got to have the right North Star. When you do, then saying "yes" and "no" to the right things becomes a piece of cake. Whether that is saying yes or no to the person you're dating ... but not sure how you feel about them. About the multiple job offers you currently have to choose from. Whether you should go out for a night of socializing or stay in. Or whether to work on the weekend, or say, "nope, today is a me day."
You've got to have boundaries, and you have to have the right boundaries based on solid foundations.
Phew, well there we have it! Now, you're ready to get back in the driver's seat and be excited that YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR LIFE. You are responsible for all the life outcomes, the feelings, the realized or non-realized dreams, it's all on you.
So please live your life with intentionality.
2019 Planning Sessions
Want to go through a planning workshop with me 1-1 so we can plan out YOUR epic 2019? Sign up for a power session here! https://www.luzcgonzalez.com/power-sessions.html
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What Peak Performance topics do you want me to speak on?
Send your suggestions my way to firstname.lastname@example.org and I'll make sure to add it to my list of ongoing content! Let me know what's on your mind, and what you're struggling with when you think about living your best life and thriving.
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